Anew
by Syrae
Summary: What if Harm had to start over?
1. Chapter 1

_So, it has been a really, really, really long time since I've written, let alone, posted anything. I found this story and realized I never finished it, so I'm going to do that now. Should be fun. ;-) It's good to be back. Let me know what you think. All mistakes made are mine, I've looked over it, but haven't really corrected anything other than the big mistakes. Just so you know_.

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White House Rose Garden  
Washington DC  
1137 hours local

Lt. Commander Harmon Rabb grabbed her hand as she wanted to pull away. "Harm," he said. Damn it, why did she have to look so much like Diane? Why did she have to look like his wife whom he'd lost two years ago in a car accident? She'd left him and their little girl in need of a mother and a wife. And now was she standing in front of him. His guardian angel. The love of his life. The one who'd hold his heart forever.

Major Sarah Mackenzie narrowed her eyes at him and wondered what there was with this man that got her attention. It wasn't the fact that he didn't want to shake her hand at first, the fact that he stared at her with this look that went right through her soul. It was something else.

Even Admiral Chegwidden gave the Commander a strange look. He knew a part of the history of this man but not all and this was certainly something of Harmon Rabb's past. "You two know each other?"

But before either one of them could answer, a little girl's voice cut through the air. "Mommy!"

Harm's head snapped to the side, staring at the little girl who came running towards Mac. She was wearing a white dress with pink flowers, a gift from her grandparents. Mac frowned surprised. The girl was jumping up and down in front of her, her arms reaching up to Mac because she wanted to be picked up.

"Daddy, Mommy back!" the girl cried in enthusiasm, turning to her father.

Finally, Harm stepped forward, trying to maintain a straight face. "Honey, that's not Mommy," he whispered, holding the squirming three-year-old.

Tally pointed at Mac and said: "Mommy."

Harm shook his head. Of course she looked like Diane. But how was he going to explain to his daughter that Mac and her mother weren't the same, even though they looked like twins? How was he going to explain it to her when he barely understood himself? He looked up to Mac.

"I'm sorry, Major. She… My wife passed away two years ago and you look an awful lot like her… She only knows her mother from pictures and I think that's why she thinks that you're…" He couldn't say it. Mac wasn't Tally's mother.

Mac sympathetically nodded. "Must be the uniform, then."

He shook his head again. "She was in the Navy."

Tally looked from her father to Mac. "Mommy?"

It was barely audible but it broke Harms heart. He pulled his wallet out and showed Tally a picture of him and her mother. "Look baby, this is Mommy."

Diane's hair was shorter then Mac's and Harm prayed that Tally would get the point. Then he pointed at Mac. "And that's Mac."

But Tally didn't get. She stubbornly pointed at Mac again. "Mommy." Then at Harm. "Daddy."

Mac smiled at the little girl who looked so much like her father. "It's all right, Commander. She's not going to get it anyway."

Tally smiled a broad smile at Mac and Mac reached for her. "Let me have her."

"Are you sure?" Harm reluctantly gave his daughter over when Mac nodded. All three men looked at Mac, who was chatting with Tally. Harm gulped. Diane used to do that with their daughter.

He and Diane had married right after he came from the Academy. They'd moved all over the country when Harm was getting his assignments. Diane had been the one who'd stood by him after his crash, who'd pushed him to go to his grandmother's farm to get better. That was when she first told him that she had been thinking about children. At first he didn't want to, but while he was recovering, he finally agreed that it might be a good idea to try and have a baby.

Then they got Tally. Or Talitha Samara as her full name was. He'd loved his little girl when he'd first laid eyes on her. So had Diane. And life had been perfect. For a year. Harm would never forget that night when he got a call from the hospital that Diane got in a car accident. The doctors had tried everything to save her but it was useless. Diane died.

He'd thought that he was over it. Over the loss of Diane. But meeting Sarah Mackenzie brought all the memories floating back. And even Tally, who only knew her mother from pictures, thought that Mac was her mother.

"Diane?"

Harm looked up when he heard a familiar voice. His mother's voice. He bit his lip. Not this. Not now.

Mac's eyes darted up and she smiled. "No, sorry. Sarah Mackenzie."

Trisha Burnett-Rabb looked from her son to Sarah Mackenzie who was holding Tally in a warm embrace. She could've sworn she'd seen her late daughter-in-law. Trish knew Harm had been under that impression too, judging by the look in his eyes.

"Granma! Mommy back!" Tally pointed to Mac.

Trish felt all the blood draw from her face and she also felt a hand on her arm. Frank's hand. For some reason she felt anger towards this woman who was holding her granddaughter in her arms, although Tally seemed so at ease with her.

"What do you think that you're doing?" She took a step forward. "What are you holding my granddaughter for?"

She took Tally out of Mac's arms, who was completely dazed by the woman's outburst. "Excuse me?"

"You have absolutely no right to make her think that you're her mother. Or my son's wife for that matter. What are you doing here in the first place?"

"Mom, I was okay with it. I tried to explain to Tally but she wouldn't get it and the Major said that it was okay, so I was okay with it. The Major is my new partner at JAG," Harm softly explained.

"Oh, and you decided that you'd been a single parent for long enough so you thought that you'd make her your partner outside JAG?" his mother sneered.

Harm was taken aback by that and swallowed hard. This was not how he'd imagined things to go and took a step towards his mother. "We're not having this discussion right now. Tally, I'll see you tonight all right? Have a great time with Grandma and Grandpa."

He kissed the top of his daughter's head and turned to the Admiral. "I'm sorry, sir. It won't happen again."

Chegwidden nodded and the four officers started to make their way to the limousine that awaited them.


	2. Chapter 2

_Thanks, guys, for all the reviews and support. Really good to be back. ;-)_

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Outside Harms apartment  
Georgetown, VA  
1320 hours local

"Please don't take any notice of the mess, but I've just moved in here with her and I'm still trying to figure out what to do with all the stuff," Harm said as he pushed the door open.

Mac smiled. "That's all right." She stopped dead in her tracks as she looked at a wedding picture of Harm and his wife, which was standing on the dresser next to the door. She didn't even know her name. What Mac did get was that she indeed had had a twin. It really could've been her.

Harm stopped and followed her gaze. "Diane. Her name was Diane."

"Now I know why you gave me that look this morning. Why your daughter thinks I'm her mother."

Harm nodded. "Tally only knows her mother from the pictures I keep around the house. She was too young to remember her when Diane died."

Mac's eyes traveled around the room. He'd done a great job on the place, she could tell. There were two or three pictures of him and Diane on the mantelpiece and one on the dresser, but the place was filled up with pictures of him and Tally or Tally alone.

"Tally?"

"Talitha. Diane shorted it down to that. It stuck."

She wondered around the apartment. He was right, it still was a mess. But who cared about that right now? Mac had to admit that she liked Tally. She was all fun and happy, probably because of her father's efforts to keep her the little girl.

Harm, on the other hand, was suffering under the loss of his wife. She'd seen the struggle and longing in his eyes when she volunteered to take Tally. And she was sure his mother was suffering under the loss as well. She'd lost her beloved daughter-in-law and Mac knew now that she was spitting image of Diane. That would make it even more difficult for her to accept her as Harm's new partner at work.

Harm emerged from his bedroom and stopped to look at her. He wished he could stop seeing her as Diane, but right now, all the memories he'd shared with his wife were coming back to him. The first time they met, their wedding day, the pregnancy… Everything. He swallowed hard and started to walk to his desk.

Mac had seen it. "I understand, Harm. I don't think it's… easy to see her every time you look at me and realizing that she's not here anymore…"

He closed his briefcase with a hard bang. "I… I don't really feel comfortable discussing this with you, Major."

"Let's focus on the case ahead of us, then?"

Harm let his breath out, thankful she understood. "Yes, please." He blinked with his eyes. He saw her again. Hearing her talk made it even worse. But she couldn't help it. She just couldn't. And he was very hard trying not to hold it against her that she wasn't Diane.

The door to Harms apartment opened and Mac immediately felt a little figure cling onto her legs. She caressed Tally's head and looked up. The look in Trish's eyes was hard and cold.

"Major."

"Mrs. Rabb."

Trish turned around. "That's Mrs. Burnett, Major."

Mac slowly nodded. "I'm sorry, ma'am. I didn't mean to insult you."

"You already did that by picking my granddaughter up this morning, Major. What are you doing here anyway?"

"Mom, quit it," Harm shot his mother a warning look. "We're going away for a couple of days. A case has come up and duty calls. I'm sorry."

Tally reached up to Mac and Mac picked her up. "You heard that, Tally?"

"Mommy and Daddy go 'way," the toddler said.

Harm nodded. "Yes, honey. But I promise to be back as soon as I can okay?" He kissed the top of her head. "Let's go."

Mac set Tally down on her feet and waved at the little girl.

"Mommy kiss!"

Mac bit her lip, looking from Tally to Harm. "Uhm…"

"It's okay. I'm not able to change her mind about the whole thing yet, anyway. Play along with her if you don't mind. I'll find a way to make it clear to her when we get back." It hurt Harm to say it but it was the only solution there was at the moment.

"I don't mind." Mac bent down to kiss Tally on her cheek. "Bye, little girl." She smiled and followed Harm outside.

Frank looked at his wife and shook his head. "It's his life, Trish. His daughter. You can't make him do something he doesn't want to do. And you can't tell him what to do either. I know it's a shock to see the spitting image of Diane in front of you when she isn't, but we're gonna have to live with that."

"That doesn't make it any easier, Frank," Trish spat back.

He shook his head and patted her shoulder. "Do you honestly think that it's easy for him? He used to see her every day, he used to talk to her, hold her… You think it's easy for him?"

Trish shook her head. "No," she whispered. "It's not easy for him."

Somewhere near Red Rock Mesa  
2249 hours local

Frank was right. It wasn't easy for him to see his late wife every time he turned around. He didn't even have to turn around. Knowing that she was sitting next to him, made him want to hold her hand, touch her in any way he could. Every single time his hand unconsciously started to reach for hers, he had to remind himself that it wasn't his wife who was sitting next to him.

Mac was leaning against the truck when he emerged from the toilets. All it took for this guy to look great was a pair of jeans and a black shirt. It lit his face up even though he still looked tired. She'd seen his hand moving sometimes and knew that his mind still didn't register that she wasn't Diane. Not that she minded. He must've loved her very much, and probably still did.

Billie turned to look at the sky. "There's a storm coming up. I don't know how far you guys want to go?"

Harm looked up to Mac. "She's taking me this time. She's driving."

She gave him a small smile. "It's still another fifty to sixty miles or so. We'll manage."

Harm wrote a check and they got into the car. The first couple of minutes were spent in silence.

"Can I ask you something?" Mac asked.

"What?" His head snapped up. "Yes, sorry."

"How long were you two married?"

He took a deep breath. "Oh god. Almost five years. Seems like a lifetime longer though."

Mac nodded her head. "Tally is a very bright girl."

Harm grinned. "Of course she is, honey. She's ours..." He ran a hand through his hair and realized what he'd said. "Oh god. I'm sorry Mac, I didn't mean to…"

"Don't apologize to me," she cut him short. "I can't blame you. I've seen her, remember? I know it could've been me. It's fine."

He rested his head against the headrest and closed his eyes. "It's not fine, Mac. She's gone, and the fact that you look an awful lot like her doesn't mean I get to make a comment like that."

Mac tried to focus on the road but it was hard not to look at him. She understood that he was all frantic about making a mistake in her presence but she didn't mind. She couldn't. "Don't worry about it, okay? I know it's probably not the first time you'll say something like that and who knows how many times it already crossed your mind? _I don't blame you!_"

He nodded. "I got that!"

She gave him a smile. "Right. Sorry."

Harm was staring at her lips. She even had the same smile. Everything about her was the same. The color of her eyes, her hair, nose, lips, smile, voice… Everything. How was he ever going to get used to working with her? How was he going to cope with seeing her everyday?


	3. Chapter 3

_Thank for all the wonderful reviews, everyone. :-) Turns out that I only kept the original two chapters of this story, everything you'll read from here on, is new. :D On the downside, it also means that chapters might be a little shorter than you're used to. _

_Enjoy, and let me know what you think! _

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JAG HQ  
Falls Church, VA  
1650 hours local

It had been three months. Three long months; and unconsciously Harm had kept Tally away from Mac. He just had a really hard time hearing her call Mac Mommy, and since it was too confusing for Tally's three-year-old brain to grasp the difference, he just opted for the easiest solution.

Not that he didn't like Mac. He did. They worked together brilliantly. She challenged him, argued, even, when she disagreed on something with him. Harm loved it. She kept him on his toes.

But even his brain sometimes seemed to forget that Mac wasn't Diane. That he wasn't arguing with his wife. Every now and then, in the middle of an argument, he'd throw something at her that didn't make sense, just because he was looking right through her Marine green uniform.

Mac would just look at him, silently, and raise an eyebrow. "So, just to get back to the matter at hand…" she'd say. No comment about how he was seeing things, just something to make him realize that he wasn't talking to Diane.

He had an actual fight with his mother just last week. It was that one day that he couldn't avoid that Tally would see Mac, and his mother had heard Tally talk about it on the phone. At first, he had written her odd behavior off as shock at seeing Diane's twin. But she just wouldn't back down.

For some reason he hated his mother's hostility towards Mac. Like she could help it that she was the twin of his late wife. Ever since, he hadn't called, or written. No form of communication whatsoever. Obviously, he got his stubbornness from his mother.

Harm was very aware that he couldn't keep Tally away from Mac forever. It wouldn't be fair. He understood that she would need some female role model in her life, and by the time that Tally was a teenager, the age difference between her and his mother would be too big.

"If this is your doing, Di, it's not funny," he mumbled. Not one to believe in ghosts, or spirits; he didn't believe that Diane had anything to do with this, wherever she was. But sometimes he couldn't help but wonder. If this was to help him get over her, it wasn't. There were times that Harm thought it only made his yearning worse. There was a reason he hadn't started dating yet.

"Aren't you supposed to pick someone up by now?"

Mac's voice broke him out of his reverie. He smiled. "I am. Just finishing up, here."

"We did good today, in court," Mac said, as she watched Harm gather his things.

"We did," Harm agreed. "Once you saw things my way…"

Mac stuck her tongue out at him. "You and your ego… You just keep thinking that. I'll prove you wrong one day."

He laughed. "Sure, Mac."

Then again, if Diane wasn't the one who had sent her, why did he feel so comfortable around her?


	4. Chapter 4

_Okay, so for all of those who read the previous chapter 4, I'm sorry! I decided to rewrite, and slow down the pace a bit. Hope you enjoy anyway. And Chris, thanks for the constructive criticism. ;-)_

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Harm and Tally's apartment  
Georgetown, VA  
1940 hours local

"… and they lived happily ever after." Harm closed the book. "Time for bed now, Tal."

Tally crawled under the covers; her teddy bear tucked under her arm. "Daddy?"

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"Why doesn't Mommy live with us?"

Harm sank down on her bed and frowned. "Why do you ask that? Mommy hasn't lived with us for a long time."

"Why? Doesn't she like to live with us?" Tally asked.

He shook his head. "She would love to live with us, Tally, that's not it. She can't."

Tally looked confused. "Why not? Why does she always go away? I really like it when she's here."

Oh, that was it. It still confused Harm. Every time she started to talk about Mom, he assumed she was talking about Diane. But Tally meant Mac. "I'm sure she likes to be here, sweetheart. But Mac has her own house." Harm caressed her head. "Why do you call her Mom?"

Tally pointed to the wedding photo of him and Di on her nightstand. "Because."

If only things were so simple. Harm wished that he could explain it to her so she would understand. But what explanation could there possibly be that her three-year-old brain would get? He swallowed, taking a deep breath. "Have you ever seen two people who look exactly the same?"

She shook her head. "Can they?"

"They can." Harm smiled at her. "When they do, they are called twins. And twins look a lot alike."

"Mmm." Tally didn't seem convinced. "That's strange, Daddy."

"Not really. A lot of people are twins." Another breath. "It's the same with Mommy and Mac. Think of them as two people who look a lot alike."

Tally looked at him for a while. A few different emotions crossed her face. How could she have two Mommies? That would be strange. All the kids in school only had one Mommy. It would make no sense for her to have two. To relieve some tension, she started laughing. "You're being silly, Daddy!" Right?

And this was what frustrated Harm to no end. No matter how he tried to explain, the concept of twins was foreign to her. Having her say Mommy to a woman that hadn't been in their lives for more than three months, hurt. It felt as if someone had stabbed him and was sadistically twisting the knife, just to make him hurt more. As if losing his wife hadn't been bad enough.

He gave her a half-hearted smile. "Yeah, Daddy is being silly." He tucked her in. "Go to sleep, honey. Sweet dreams."

Closing the door behind him, Harm went back to the living room. He felt like throwing something, anything. He was angry; angry at the drunk driver that hit Diane, angry at the doctors that hadn't been able to save her, angry at himself for finding it hard to raise Tally on his own, angry at Tally for not understanding that there was a difference between Mac and Diane. He felt furious and defeated. And for the first time in a long time, he felt like crying.

Not one to openly show his emotions; Harm found that he couldn't swallow his tears anymore. It was too much. And so he cried.


	5. Chapter 5

Thanks for all the support, everyone. As I said, I'm changing the pace of the story a little, taking it more slow, so here we are. ;-) Let me know what you think!

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JAG HQ  
Falls Church, VA  
1610 hours local

"I'm not discussing this with you, Mother," Harm replied through the phone. "I mean it."

He was packing his briefcase. One of his clients got arrested and he needed to go. He needed to sort it out and there was no time to have this seemingly everlasting discussion with his mother.

"Where is Tally going to stay? I could take the plane right now…"

He cut her off. "And be here in the middle of the night? No Mom, I have a baby sitter on call that is going to pick Tally up from school and it should be fine."

"Don't you dare to let her stay with the Major!"

Harm sighed. After six months, his mother still was no fan of Mac and it could frustrate him more than anything. "Mom, I can't do this right now. Wherever Tally stays tonight is up to me and not up to you and I'm done with this. Are we clear?"

"You can't let her stay with the Major," his mother repeated.

Harm slammed his briefcase shut. "Please give my love to Frank, Mother. I'll talk to you soon." And he ended the connection.

On the other end of the line, Frank lifted an eyebrow at his wife. "What exactly were you doing?"

Trish threw him a death glare. "I was trying to knock some sense into him."

Frank put his paper down. "Why would he need that? He seems completely sensible to me."

"Well, he's not. And someone needs to be there to tell him."

Still, Frank tried to defend his stepson. "You're overreacting, darling. He is quite capable of taking care of himself and Tally. Especially Tally."

"He was in hysterics when he called a few weeks back."

"He's a single parent. Of course he finds it hard." He frowned at her. "For some reason you hated Mac on sight, and I can't for the life of me figure out why."

Trish shrugged. "There is just something about her I don't like," she said. "I don't have to like everyone that walks this earth."

"You don't," Frank relented. "But hating someone on sight is not like you, Trish. It worries me."

She waved it off and went on her way to the kitchen. "You've got nothing to be worried about. I'm fine."

Frank watched her as she disappeared. Something was off. He couldn't find out exactly what it was, but something was wrong with her behavior and he didn't like it. Trish didn't hate someone on sight; it was not like her. She had adored Diane, and had Frank first thought that it was the shock of seeing Di's twin, it had been months and she was still so hostile. Why she went overboard every time Harm mentioned Mac, he didn't understand.

In the meantime, Harm went by Mac's office. She was glued to her computer screen, mulling something over. "I need a favor."

She looked up. "Hey, you." Noticed the briefcase in his hand. "Where are you going?"

"I need to fish Petty Officer George out of the brig. Mrs Lawson is still ill; would you mind picking Tally up from school? I don't know how long this is going to take."

"Of course." She smiled. "Don't worry, I'll go get her. We'll see you when you get back."

He nodded, still looking stern. Something was on his mind, and he wasn't telling her. "Yeah." He looked at her again and gave her a something that needed to pass for a smile. "Thanks, Mac. I really appreciate it."

"Any time." She watched him go. If he needed her to pick up Tally, he really was out of options. Mac knew that he didn't like to ask her to do things for him when it concerned Tally. She could understand. It would only add to the ongoing confusion. She had kept quiet, distancing herself from them. No matter how much she liked them, she didn't want to add to his pain.

Harm had enough on his plate as it was. A few cases, Tally's refusal to call her anything other than 'Mommy', being a single parent… And he was still grieving, somewhere deep down inside, Mac was sure of it.

Maybe if she tried to explain Tally tonight, she might get through. Because, as much as Mac secretly liked to be call Mom, she saw Harm slowly die. And _that_ she didn't want.


	6. Chapter 6

_And I'm back! After having trouble uploading a document for almost two weeks (!), here I am, again. This is a sort of transitional piece between the last chapter and the next. Hope you like it, let me know. ;-)_

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Mac's apartment  
Georgetown, VA  
2120 hours local

The knock on her door caused Mac to look up from her notepad. She looked through her spyhole, and, seeing it was Harm, opened the door. "Hey."

He looked tired. "Hey."

"Have you eaten?" was the first question out of her mouth.

His response was negative. "Two bites of a sandwich, a few hours ago."

She smiled. "I have leftovers. Tally insisted on spaghetti." Mac went on her way to the kitchen. "Did you get him out?"

Harm threw his tie and jacket over the back of a chair. "Sort of. It's a long story, and honestly, the last thing I want to do is talk about work. There will be plenty of that, tomorrow."

Mac put his dish in the microwave and turned it on. "Water? Or would you rather have a beer?"

"I have to drive, Mac."

"Water it is, then." She put a bottle in front of him. For a moment, she was silent. "Are you okay? You seemed distracted when you left."

"I'm fine." His first instinct was to cut her off. To do what he always did, and just hold everything in until it would be too much. But something told him that he could tell her. "I was distracted. I had just hung up on my Mom."

Mac frowned. "What happened?"

"The same thing that's been happening ever since you met her. She doesn't like you, and I put that mildly, and both me and Frank can't seem to figure out why."

Mac shrugged, unfazed. "What did she say?"

"She basically ordered me not to leave Tally with you, _twice_. Told me she could get on a plane and come take care of her."

"That would've taken awfully long."

"That's what I said." He shook his head and took the offered plate from her. "It feels like she hates you, and hating someone is beyond my mother." He took a bite, chewed and swallowed. "So, why she's behaving like this…"

"Could be a million reasons. Mothers have done worse things than hating the people their children work with. It's fine."

Harm wasn't so sure that it was fine, but he let it go, knowing that she would handle whatever was next, with grace. Then he remembered something. "Did you have a problem picking Tally up? I totally forgot to call."

Mac shook her head. "They have very little to be worried about when she comes running, calling Mommy." She saw Harm wince. "I'm sorry, that was blunt." She traced the rim of her cup. "I actually tried to explain the difference to her, before bedtime. But she doesn't seem to grasp the concept of twins."

"She doesn't," Harm said. "I've tried that route with her, a few times, actually. I even went as far as showing pictures, but it's not the same." He sighed. "And I have no other way of explaining it to her."

"Me either." She paused. "I'm sorry, Harm. It must be killing you."

Harm shrugged. "It's not as if we haven't tried. I really appreciate you talking to her, Mac. I guess we just have to wait until she has twins at school."

"That could be a few years, if ever."

"I know." He looked at her. "You're sure you're not Di's real twin? You don't have a picture of you with your twin sister?"

Mac shook her head, regretfully. "As far as I know, I don't have a twin. Then again, stranger things have happened in my family. I'll ask Uncle Matt and get back to you." She grinned.

He smiled. "Don't worry about it. Di hasn't mentioned a twin either, so I guess you are just a fine example of the "you-have-a-twin-somewhere-in-the-world" thing." He took another bite. "It just confuses the hell out of all of us."

"It does." She smiled. "I'm sorry, though. It makes everything way more complicated than it should have to be."

"It's not your fault." He looked at her. "I'm sorry if I have been distant or anything. I don't want to hurt you but sometimes just looking at you throws me off, or makes me angry…" He took a breath. "It's just hard."

She touched his arm. "Don't worry about it. I can understand."

Harm put his fork down on his now empty plate and paused for a little while. "I should go get her, get her back in her own bed. Thanks for dinner, and for picking her up."

"Any time," Mac said.

Ten minutes later, she watched Harm open the door, a sleeping Tally in his arms. Again, he smiled. "Thanks again, Mac. It really means a lot. See you tomorrow?"

"Bright and early."

"Night."

"Night."

They disappeared into the hall and Mac closed the door behind them. Maybe it was time to call Uncle Matt. Ask him if there was something that she needed to know…


	7. Chapter 7

And here's another chapter! I took some liberties, so let's pretend that Uncle Matt didn't go to Leavenworth, okay? ;-) Let me know what you think.

* * *

Mac's apartment  
Georgetown, VA  
2055 hours local

After a rough day at the office, with a non-cooperating client, and being stuck in traffic for way longer than she cared to remember, Mac had thrown some leftovers in her microwave, and now, after haven eaten, she was finally sitting on her couch, leafing through her mail.

Most of it was bills and ads, but there was a small package. She turned it over. Uncle Matt. She had written, asking if he knew anything about her having a twin sister. Having not seen her parents in fifteen years, he was the only one she could ask.

It was a stack of photos. A note attached to them. _This is what Aunt Helen left for you, and somehow I forgot all about it. So here it is. I do hope that you find what you're looking for, Sarah. _

Her Aunt, Uncle Matt's wife, had died a few years earlier, after being sick for years. It had been a relief, sort of, but Mac missed her terribly. She put the note down, and opened the box he had sent with it.

They were all pictures she hadn't seen before. Her parents; looking happy and in love. If only it could've stayed that way. Aunt Helen and Uncle Matt before they were even married. Her mother pregnant. It were all images of a life Mac had not known. Things had turned downwards quickly after she was born. She had never known this happy and sort of carefree side to her parents. It was a comfort to know that, at least, her mother had been happy for a little while.

It were the last three pictures that shook her to her core. Her mother in the hospital, haven just given birth, holding not one, but two pink bundles. Looking exhausted, but ecstatic at the same time. Mac frowned, turning the picture. Her birthday. Could it really be…?

The other two pictures confirmed her suspicion. There had been two of them. The other two pictures showed her and her sister a few months later. So they had been together for a few months at least. But what happened? What separated them?

Mac looked into the box, looking for some sort of explanation. There was a letter. Not in Uncle Matt's handwriting, but that of Aunt Helen. How..?

_Dearest Sarah, _

_If you're reading this, it probably means two things. You've found the pictures, and with it, the best kept secret in the family, and I'm no longer here to explain any of it to you. I will try, anyway. _

_Please know that no matter what your mother did in the past, she really loves you. Both of you. As you've probably figured out, you have a twin sister. When your mother found out she was pregnant, she was thrilled. I haven't seen her happier than then. Please believe that. Your father was young, and although not visible at the surface, there were little signs that he had a dark side to him. Deanne was slightly worried about it, but thought that her love for him, and the love of a family would somehow cure him. _

_It did, for a little while. The day you and Cassie were born, she was so happy. It was one of the best days. That is your sister's name, by the way. Cassie Joy Mackenzie. The first four months, everything was okay. It was busy, but we helped out where we could. _

_He started hitting her. I'm sorry I'm being blunt, Sarah, but you know he did. There's no need to sugar coat things. At first, she tried to hide it. We could understand. But after six months, he had enough. Enough of the two of you crying; calling for attention. Things turned really bad. Deanne couldn't protect you both._

_Sarah, please understand that if Matt and I had been in any place that we could have taken one, or both of you, with us, we would have. I swear. It will always be my biggest regret. I hated seeing you in trouble. And even though we had to move away, Deanne kept us in the loop for as long as she was with you. _

_To make a long story short, there was this couple on base that couldn't have any children. The husband was scheduled to transfer out, somewhere in the Mediterranean, I believe. She thought that she could at least keep one of you safe from him if you were with her. Cassie was given to the Schonkes two days after your first birthday. Deanne had told Joe that she'd been in the hospital off base. All this time, your mother has pretended that your sister died. And your father didn't bat an eye. Life moved on as it had before. _

_Like I said, I wish we could've taken both of you with us to Okinawa. That way, you at least would've been safe from Joe. But I was already sick, Sarah, and no matter how much I wanted, in no shape to take care of a baby, let alone two. Please understand, that in her own way, your mother has always tried to protect you from him. But I think that a person can only take so much. We're really lucky that Matt found you when he did. _

_We're really proud of the person you've become, and please know that we think of you as our own. I hope that you are able to find her, Sarah. Because you have a sister, and you at least deserve to know her. _

_I love you. _

_Helen_

Mac sat back. It explained a lot. She could understand that her mother would think that she at least could protect one of her children. It would've been an inner struggle. One that Mac hoped she would never have to face.

It also meant that she needed to talk to Harm. It would put some ease into the situation, but it would be awkward. Then again, Mac was glad that Di had found a wonderful husband, and that she had been happy. Genuinely happy.

But it also hurt that she wasn't here anymore. Except for her looks, and what she'd maybe know from Harm, she wouldn't know if Diane, or Cassie, had the same mannerisms as she did. If they could get excited about the same things.

Having grown up the way she did, Mac had always longed for a sibling, someone to share the fear and the happy moments with. Knowing for sure that there had been a sibling, but that they had been torn apart, hurt.

Mac clutched the letter and the photos to her heart. Now she had to tell Uncle Matt that she had found her sister. Sort of…


	8. Chapter 8

Okay, everyone... I know this part if awfully short, but let's call it a transitional piece and I promise the next chapter will be longer, all right? I just had to cut it here. ;-)

* * *

JAG HQ  
Falls Church, VA  
1650 hours local

"We need to talk."

Those words had been hunting her for the better part of a week. She hadn't spoken them out loud; she'd only thought them over and over again. Mac knew she couldn't avoid Harm forever. She had to tell him that she was related to Diane. Cassie. Whatever her name was.

Even for herself it was a hard concept to grasp. How was she supposed to tell him? What was she supposed to say that would make it easier? She even tried to ask Uncle Matt, but he, like her, was at a loss for an answer.

Uncle Matt had been relieved that Aunt Helen found a way to tell her about Cassie. Diane. Mac still wasn't sure what to call her in her head. To Harm she would always be Diane. To Uncle Matt she would always be Cassie. Mac figured that she had to come to her own conclusions. Maybe Diane was easier for now.

They had talked about Diane for an entire night over the phone. Mac had gotten more answers than the ones Aunt Helen had provided from him. She understood her mother's reasons for giving Diane up. Sometimes Mac wished she could tell her mother about her life, about understanding certain decisions she had made. But not even Uncle Matt knew where she was. Deanne Mackenzie had vanished into thin air.

Maybe it was for the best. Not having seen her mother for fifteen years, Mac wasn't sure what she should say to her now. She had changed so much. But maybe knowing that her sister had been happy would ease some of her mother's pain. At this point, Mac would settle for just letting her know that. To let her know that Diane had been really happy.

Her first hurdle in telling anyone, was still telling Harm. Mac wasn't really afraid of his reaction; knowing that she was her sister would make telling Tally a whole lot easier. But sometimes Mac wondered if it wasn't so extremely hard for him to be around her every day. Maybe it was time to ask him. Maybe not. It was still a very sensitive subject for him to discuss and Mac knew she had to tread carefully.

When she looked up, she saw Harm cross the bullpen. He was probably on his way out. She at least could ask him if it was okay if she came by later. Mac rose, smoothed her jacket down and went over to his office.

Harm was in the process of packing his briefcase and she halted in the doorway, not entirely sure how to start this conversation. He looked up. "Hey."

She dove in, head first. "We need to talk."


	9. Chapter 9

Wow, I know it has been ages since I posted anything. Sorry guys, I hit a road block with this chapter. Some of you may remember a different chapter where Harm and Mac sat down and told tried to explain to Tally what was going on. Well, this is that same chapter, but slightly altered because now of course we know Mac and Di are twins. Let me know what you think, okay?

* * *

Harm and Tally's apartment  
Georgetown, VA  
1850 hours local

"Tally, dinner is almost ready." Harm stuck his head into the living room. "Please clean up."

Tally smiled at him. "What is for dinner?"

"Salmon." Harm started to set the table. He and Mac had talked about Mac's discovery that she and Diane were twin sisters. It would make explaining it to Tally easier, thankfully. But Harm had still been surprised. It was unexpected. Maybe Tally would finally understand and stop calling Mac Mommy. It bothered him like nothing else, somehow.

The knock on the door added to Tally's excitement about dinner, and especially when she saw Mac standing in the hallway. "Mommy!"

Mac grinned at her. "Hello to you too, Tally." She winked at Harm's half-smile. "I picked up her dress from the cleaners, like you asked."

Bud and Harriet's wedding was only two weeks away, and Tally was their flower girl. Harm nodded. "Thank you."

"Mommy, we're having salmon for dinner!" Tally had her arms wrapped around one of Mac's legs.

"Well, that sounds wonderful, little girl," Mac laughed. "But how about you let go of my leg, just for now, so I can come in?"

Harm swallowed a lump in his throat he didn't know he had, as he took the dress from Mac. "Tell her after dinner?"

Although it really was a working dinner, this bridge needed to be crossed too. After three months trying to explain on his own, Harm felt that it was easier to explain _with _Mac, rather than _about_ her. Especially now that she had pictures to show Tally.

"Yeah, let's do dinner first," Mac agreed.

Mac could read him like a book after this time. Every time Tally addressed her as her mother, it broke Harm's heart into pieces. And all Harm's attempts to explain it had been futile. With this new information, things should be easier.

So, after dinner they sat Tally down. Sitting in Harm's lap, she looked from one adult to the other. Harm didn't really know how to start. "Honey, remember how I've tried to explain that Mac is not your Mom?"

Tally nodded, obviously a little confused by all this. She pointed to the picture of Diane on the side table. "But she looks the same," she said.

"I do," Mac answered. "You're right, I do." She reached for her purse. "Sometimes people look alike." She got her pictures. "You see?"

Tally studied the images. "Is that you?"

Mac nodded. "That is me and my sister. You see how we look exactly the same?"

Tally studied the pictures some more, then shook her head. "Mommy was alone Mommy." Her lower lip trembled. "Mommy was alone Mommy."

"Oh, sweetheart…" Mac thought for a moment. She looked at Harm. What were they supposed to tell her? "She was, honey. You only get one Mommy. But that doesn't mean that there can't be someone who looks like her. It doesn't mean that she didn't love you."

She gently tapped Tally's knee. Tally stayed rooted in her place, not saying anything for a long time. She still looked confused when she finally opened her mouth. "I don't understand… If I had two Mommies, why didn't I see you?"

Harm looked at Mac. Why was she so smart? How were they going to explain that? But Mac had an answer to that, too.

"Well, when two people grow up, they don't spend as much time together as they did when they were kids. Your mom married your dad and had you, and I went to college and joined the Marines. That's two very different lives." Mac thought of an example. "Do you know what Rose and Pippa want to be when they grow up?" she asked, referring to Tally's best friends.

"A dancer and a doctor." Well, at least she seemed to follow.

"See? If one becomes a dancer and the other a doctor, they won't see each other a lot when they grow up, because they will work in different places, maybe even live in different cities. Like your mom and me."

Both adults held their breaths, as Tally seemed to consider that train of thought. "Does that mean that I don't have a Mommy now?"

Harm was quick to contradict that. "No, sweetie, absolutely not. It only means that you don't have a Mommy that can be here to take care of you."

"Doesn't she want to?"

Again, Harm felt his heart break into a million pieces. "She wouldn't have wanted anything else, sweetheart. She would love to be here and see you, but she can't."

Tally didn't ask why her mother couldn't. She just looked at the picture of Diane and Mac and then back at Mac. She sighed. "Okay."

Harm hugged her tight, thankful that she seemed to accept. It would make his life a whole lot easier. For Tally, there were more important things to think about.

"Does that mean that you can't read me a bedtime story anymore?"

Mac laughed, relieved. "No, it doesn't mean that at all. Lead the way, little girl."


	10. Chapter 10

Thanks for all the positive reviews, everyone. I'm glad that we got that out of the way, now we can move on! Let me know what you think! Enjoy!

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Harm and Tally's apartment  
Georgetown, VA  
2205 hours local

They had spent the rest of the evening working on their case. Finally settling on a strategy and an opening statement, they were now sitting at the table, just chatting.

Mac put her tea down. "Can I ask you something?"

"Anything."

She regarded him, as if to say 'be careful what you wish for'. "If I'm overstepping bounds here, please tell me, but what are you going to do when Tally goes back from Aunt Mac to Mom? I mean; I know we somehow made it clear, but she's four. Tonight she might understand, tomorrow might be a whole other story."

It had crossed Harm's mind too. And what was he going to do? Tally obviously liked Mac; they got along really well. He shook his head, shrugging. "Honestly, I have no idea. I always thought that if I ever remarried and she would start to call that person, whoever she might be, Mom, that I'd be okay with that. She has absolutely no recollection of Diane whatsoever, she was thirteen months old when Di died…"

"What changed?"

"You happened. And I mean that in a much nicer way than it sounds, Mac, really. I just never considered that there would be someone that would look like the spitting image of Di. Let alone that I would ever meet her, and had to deal with all the consequences that came from it."

Mac nodded. "Do you hate me for it? For looking like her?"

"No." He looked up at her, searching for the words to express himself. "Hate is too big of a word, I think. I don't hate you; you can't help that you look like her, obviously. I think that I resent myself for finding it really hard to work with you for the first couple of months. And for keeping Tally away from you, too."

"Why? That would seem like a very logical reaction. I can't even phantom what it would be like to lose the one you decided to spent the rest of your life with, let alone that you'd be reminded of it every time you go to work." She shook her head. "I'm sure that everything just felt raw again."

"It did. It felt like I just lost her all over again." He gave her a rueful smile. "And maybe I was just being overprotective of Tally. But I couldn't give her the impression that her Mom had returned, only to lose her again if or when you get reassigned."

"Which is understandable. Is that why you've been holding off on dating? Afraid that it'll be too much?"

Harm had to think about it. "Maybe I'm afraid that it will be too much for me. I mean; I would have to get to know someone all over again. I'm not really sure that I want to invest the time. Things are finally settling down here; bringing a whole new person into the mix might not be a good idea."

"You don't miss having someone to come home to?" Mac asked.

Oh, how he missed that. "I do." He toyed with his wedding ring. "I really do. I have Tally to come home to, and that at least, is wonderful. But telling someone about how your day was, or just chatting like this on a daily basis… Having an adult to talk to… But just settling for someone to be here will be wrong, too, you know."

Mac could understand. "Yeah. Spending a lifetime with someone who isn't right is awfully long." She smiled. "For you, let alone for Tally."

Harm laughed. "Oh, yeah, if Tally doesn't like you, you'll know." He looked at her for a moment. "You been out on a date lately?"

"Nope." Mac traced the rim of her cup and cleared her throat. "Actually, I'm in the middle of a very amicable divorce, so dating seems wrong, some how. Way too much explaining to do."

"A divorce?"

She shrugged. "A youthful indiscretion when I was eighteen. Haven't seen him since he went to jail a year later. Just never thought to take care of it, until I figured that I should before it would come back to bite me in the six."

"Awfully young to be married, too," he said. "Eighteen?"

"Oh, come on. Like you and Di weren't at least together, then."

"We were," he acknowledged. "Didn't get married until way later, though. I would've made a lousy husband at eighteen."

She laughed. "Right. I don't think you could make a lousy husband if you tried, Harm. Chris and I got married for all the wrong reasons, and we both realize that since we haven't seen each other in ten years, divorcing seems like the right thing to do. Move on."

"You wanted to escape?" He knew about her childhood, they had talked about it before.

She gave him a wry smile. "You know living with my dad was no picnic. At least Chris and I could be drunk together and he wasn't as abusive." She took a deep breath. "Like I said, a youthful indiscretion."

Sometimes, it was too hard to talk about. Mistake followed by mistake. But she had decided that she wasn't her mistakes. At least she had tracked him down and the divorce would be finalized soon. It would be in the past.

"Going on the hunt for a new and improved husband, then?" Harm grinned.

Mac stuck her tongue out. "I think that I'll first figure out what that guy has to be and do before I'll consider marriage again. It may take a while."

"You'll know when it's right," Harm assured her.

"Let's hope so." She rose. "I should go. Thanks for dinner, and this…"

Harm nodded. "This was nice," he agreed.

Mac gathered her things and flung her bag over her shoulder. "See you tomorrow?"

"Bright and early." He opened the door for her. "Let me know when you're home?"

"As always." She squeezed his hand in passing. "Night, Harm."

"Night." He closed the door behind her and walked over to the window to make sure she'd make it to her car in one piece. When she did, he looked up to the sky. "Oh, Di…"


	11. Chapter 11

Thanks so much for the reviews everyone! Glad that you like the direction this is going. :-) Now, as promised a few chapters back, the big confrontation with Trish. Let me know what you think!

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Harm and Tally's apartment  
Georgetown, VA  
1920 hours local

Harm slammed the door shut and looked at his mother, fuming. "That is the absolute last time you talked to her like that," he said through gritted teeth.

Trish raised an eyebrow at him. "Tally could've easily stayed with us. She has no business babysitting her."

"Don't you think that's _my_ decision to make? No matter who I decide gets to babysit Tally, is none of your damned business, Mom."

She didn't agree with him, that much was obvious. Trish crossed her arms. "And where exactly is she taking her?"

Harm stared at his mother for a long time. "What is your problem with Mac? Why are you doing this?"

"I'm just looking out for my son and granddaughter," Trish defended herself. "No more."

"You're doing it in an awfully aggressive way, Mother. Since when do you think that I can't look out for the both of us?"

Mac had come to pick Tally up and go to her place. Harm had to leave the next morning very early for Quantico, and had asked Mac to bring Tally to school and pick her up later. He'd try to join them later, depending on how smoothly his interviews would go. Otherwise Tally would stay another night.

His mother and Frank had unexpectedly turned up, and when his mother understood that Mac was there to take Tally with her, she'd thrown a tantrum. Trish huffed. "I don't want Tally to get the wrong impression."

"And what impression would that be, Mother? That I leave her with someone we both trust?"

"Just because she looks like Diane does not mean that Tally has to call her Mom, or that she can surrogate. What if the Major gets reassigned? What is Tally going to think then?

She'll have abandonment issues by the time she's six."

Tally would occasionally slip up, and call Mac Mom instead of Aunt Mac. Harm didn't mind, as both adults had known that it would probably go that way. Tally tended to slip back into Mom-mode whenever she felt uneasy. Trish's reaction had forced her back into her comfortable place, and it was for that reason alone that Trish had heard her call Mac Mommy.

Harm couldn't believe his ears. "What Tally calls her, is between me, Mac and Tally. You don't have a say. If I decide that _the Major_ gets to babysit her, that is all on me. And Tally is the last one to have abandonment issues." He ran a hand through his hair. "Just tell me what it really is, Mom. I know it's hard seeing Di's twin, but god, I work with her every day. You got to see Di maybe twice a year, and you're having more trouble with this, than I am."

"Do you think that you're in love with her?"

"I'm sorry?" Harm felt his eyes grow wide. What the hell was this?

"It's a very easy question, Harmon. Do you think that you're in love with her?"

"Why think? I'm pretty sure that I'd know whether I'm in love with her or not." He shook his head. "Is that it? Are you afraid that I'm projecting my love for Di on Mac?"

Trish shrugged. "It's easy enough to look right through and forget that she isn't Di."

"Mom, I've been working with her for a months. I _know_ the difference." Oh, he knew the difference. Mac was feistier than Di; she'd take absolutely no crap from him, in- or outside the courtroom. She took great care of Tally, whenever she needed to. He respected her for overcoming her childhood and her alcoholism, and making something of herself.

Trish clenched her teeth. "I just don't want you to get a broken heart again, darling," she said.

"Because if I was to date Mac, that would, without a doubt, be the outcome? Another broken heart?"

"Once you realize that she isn't Diane… You can't replace your wife with a clone, Harm. In the end the both of you would just be miserable because of it."

Harm frowned. "Where did you get the idea that I think that Mac is Di's clone? I'll admit that I had trouble not seeing her as Di in the beginning, but that's not even an issue anymore. She's the complete opposite of Di, character wise." He paused, coming to a realization. "So, that's it. You're afraid that I'll fall head over heels in love with Mac because she looks like Di, and that scares the hell out of you, so you behave like this aggressive monster?"

They looked at each other for a moment. Harm took a deep breath. "I may understand what you're afraid of, Mother, but this is not the way to go about it. You can't protect me from another broken heart, and you can't decide what I should do with my life or Tally's, for that matter. So, I'm going to ask this nicely, this last time. You either back off and behave like a nice person, or I swear I'm going to cut ties until you can be respectful and normal to Mac."

"You wouldn't dare," Trish said.

"Watch me," Harm challenged her.

Trish glared at him. "You would throw me out because of _her_?"

Harm was already halfway to the door. "_She_ is my partner, my friend… No matter how much you might not like her, she is my friend." He opened the door. "Out, Mother. I mean it."

When she didn't move, Harm took her arm. "I love you, but I won't deal with you like this. Out." Another slam of the door; this time behind his mother. Turning around, he saw his stepfather sitting on the couch, completely forgotten by both of them. "Oh, Frank…"

Frank rose. "Don't apologize to me. I've told her before she has no reason to meddle with your life like this. You're old and wise enough to pick your friends." He patted Harm's shoulder. "I'll get her to calm down."

Harm nodded.

Frank turned around, the doorknob in his hand. "Answer me one question, Harm. Just so I know."

"What?"

"Tell me if your mother doesn't have a point, regardless of how she goes about it. You're not projecting Di on Mac?"

He shook his head. "I swear, Frank. I'm passed the point that I confuse them. She's not Di."

Frank took a moment to see the honesty in his stepson's eyes. It was a sincere answer. Not that he had expected anything else. "Good." He opened the door. "I'll call you."


	12. Chapter 12

Hey you! Thanks for all the great reviews. :-) I had a lot of fun writing that confrontation with Trish. This chapter is just to tide you over until I have the next one ready. It may take a few more days, since I've only come back from a lovely week in Belgium today. But I wanted to give you something. ;-) So, enjoy!

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Mac's apartment  
Georgetown, VA  
2040 hours local

Mac opened the door. "Everything okay?" She stepped aside to let Harm in.

"Do you feel that I'm projecting the feelings I had for Di on you?"

Mac was slightly taken aback by the blunt question. "I'm sorry?" She closed the door behind him and frowned. "What kind of question is that?"

"One my mother asked." He started to pace. "Am I, Mac? Am I pretending that you're Di?"

Mac sat down on the armrest of her couch and crossed her arms. "If you are, you're doing a lousy job at it," she said. "Is that why she's so hostile?"

Harm sighed. "The first few times I just thought it was the shock of seeing you looking like Diane. But it's been months, so that is clearly not the reason."

"Then what is?"

"She's terrified that I'm going to fall in love with you and be extremely miserable when I finally realize that you're not Di."

She considered that for a brief moment. "Well, from a mother's point of view, that would probably be a legitimate concern. Especially since you didn't know I excited till eight months ago."

"You don't have to defend her, Mac."

"I'm not," Mac said. "Really. I can see where she comes from, but you're a big boy and you can take care of yourself." She smiled. "But you probably already told her that."

Harm started pacing again. "I know that you're not Di. I haven't called you Di in ages; or seen you as Di." He looked at her. "You're so very different from her."

"So I've heard." Mac took a deep breath. "Have you worked it out?"

"I threw her out."

That was not something Mac had expected. "You did what?"

Harm raised his hands in surrender. "Before you start to cuss me out…"

"Which you would deserve…"

"… she wouldn't back down. She had no reason to go at you like she did." He sounded firm. "She can come back when she can behave normally."

Mac sighed and shook her head. "Harm, you don't throw your mother because of me. What are you going to do now? Both be stubborn and not talk for ten years? You owe it to Tally to make it up. She's the only grandmother Tally's got."

He nodded. "We'll mend fences eventually. Frank is talking to her. At least I got someone on my side." He winked.

She rolled her eyes at him. "I'm always on your side."

"I know." Finally, he sat down. "Tally went to bed easily?"

Figuring that the subject of his mother was done, Mac fell into the spot beside him. "A bedtime story solves a lot. She was out before the story was finished."

They sat in silence for a while. There wasn't always a need for words. After a while Mac turned her head to Harm. "Thank you," she said.

It confused Harm. "For what?"

"For defending me. She's your mother, you didn't have to."

Harm snorted. "Of course I did. You're my friend. You're Tally's friend. She needs to accept that, whether she likes that or not."

Mac smiled and shook her head. "I know a lot of men who would've chosen their mother over their friends."

Harm squeezed her hand. "Then they simply don't have a friend like you." And he found that he really meant that.


	13. Chapter 13

_Okay, so this update took me longer than promised, but then again, this chapter is significantly longer than the last one. ;-) Enjoy, everyone, let me know what you think. _

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JAG HQ  
Falls Church, VA  
1324 hours local

Mac stuck her head into Harm's office. "Can I have your undivided attention for one minute?"

Harm looked up from his file, slightly confused. "Mac, you always have my undivided attention." To prove it, he put his pen down and leaned back in his chair. "What's up?"

She took a seat and handed him a file. "I am officially a divorced woman."

He grinned at her. "Really? All is done and you're free?"

"I'm free!"

"Congratulations, Ms. Mackenzie." He was as equally excited. "Who is the first one you're going to call for a celebratory date?"

"Well, actually… How about I treat you and Tally to dinner and ice cream tonight? You're the only ones on my short list."

Somehow it pleased Harm that she wasn't really going on a first date with anyone. That she would ask to take him and Tally out to dinner instead of going to dinner and dancing with some guy she barely knew. But as soon as the thought came up, he buried it under a whole lot of professionalism and partnership. Somewhere it still felt too soon after Di to be moving on.

"No eligible bachelors on there? I would've thought your ball book was full."

Mac feigned disappointment. "If you so obviously don't want to go, Harm, just tell me. I was only giving you the first chance." She pretended to rise.

Harm raised his eyebrow at her. "Of course we'll go with you!" he said. "I just wanted to make sure that you're not missing out on some super exciting date with a billionaire gentleman, just to spend time with us." J

She shook her head. "I've done the dating-a-billionaire-thing, Harm. It's not even slightly as exciting as having dinner and ice cream with the two of you."

The smile on his face made her weak in the knees. Damn it. He shouldn't have that kind of power over her. But Mac felt that the more time she spent with them, the more she liked them.

"When you put it like that… Should we pick you up?"

"I'll walk the four blocks over to you. See you around seven?"

He nodded, pleased. "It's a date." Harm had already opened his mouth to backtrack, when Mac shook her head, laughing.

"Of course it is, Harm." She stuck her tongue out to him. "See you later."

His eyes followed her as she walked across the bullpen. Maybe, ever…

Tally was extremely excited when she learned that they were going out for dinner with aunt Mac. "Really?" she asked. "Can I show her my picture?"

"Of course you can." Harm ruffled her hair. For some reason, Tally's pictures lately had included Mac. There would be a third person in the picture. It made him a little uncomfortable sometimes, but most of the time, he was happy, and grateful, that Tally seemed to like Mac as much as she did. Including her in pictures was just a way to show that.

"Where are we going to eat?"

Harm looked up to her. "I don't know yet, honey. I'm not sure what Aunt Mac has in mind."

What aunt Mac had in mind was indulging in something she knew Tally loved, and something Harm tried to stay as far away from as possible. Beltway Burgers. He laughed when he saw two equally excited faces looking up at him, and knew he lost the battle there and then. Beltway Burgers it was.

"So, this is your idea of a celebratory date?" he asked, picking at his salad.

Mac's eyes danced when she smiled at him. "First, this is not a date. Second, there is no other way to celebrate than with Beltway Burgers, is there, Tally?"

Tally shook her head no, having learned that speaking with your mouth full was not done. Harm grinned. How Mac had known that Beltway Burgers were Tally's favorite… Maybe it was a family thing. Aunt and niece were the same in their love for meat. And here he was trying to raise his daughter on mostly fish and veggies.

He pointed his fork at Mac. "As long as you remember that not every week calls for a celebration, we're good."

"Luckily for us, we don't have to tell you everything we do together," Mac winked.

"Yeah, Daddy, we don't!"

Harm grabbed his chest. "You too, Tally? That hurts."

Tally was having way to good a time to take her father's reaction seriously. She giggled. "I really like Beltway Burgers, Daddy."

"I know you do."

"Then why don't we eat them more often?"

Harm glared at Mac, as if to say "Do you see what you're doing here?!" "Beltway Burgers are meant to be special, honey. If you had them every week they wouldn't be special any more."

"Beltway Burgers will always be special, Daddy." She was practically bouncing in her seat. "Even when we eat them every day!"

Harm couldn't help but laugh. "Okay, you. I got your point. But since Daddy does care about your health, unlike you and Aunt Mac, enjoy your burger while it lasts. For now they will stay a treat."

His daughter stuck her tongue out and happily took another bite from her food. At almost four, Harm didn't know where she got her appetite from. Her mother had not been a big eater, but judging by her aunt's appetite, it was another family thing. Sometimes Harm thought that Tally was more Mac than Diane, in all her little things.

After dinner, the three of them went back out, in search of what Mac called "decent ice cream."

"Is there any other kind?" Harm had wondered.

Obviously, he had a lot to learn, because Mac got into a lengthy speech about how one sort of ice cream could really differ from the other. Harm was almost sorry that he asked. Once they were seated with ice cream, Mac looked at him. "What was that I heard about a Romanian princess you have to babysit next week?"

Tally's eyes grew wide. "A princess? A real one?"

Harm rolled his eyes at Mac. "Seriously, where do you get your Intel? Sometimes I feel I have to check with you for my own schedule."

"I have ways," Mac grinned. "Yes, Tally, a real princess. How about that?"

"Can I see her?"

He shook his head. "I'm afraid not, sweetheart. I only have to go to meetings with her. Not doing any of the fun stuff, which means I'm home at night."

Tally pouted. "But a real princess, Daddy. That's even more special than a burger."

Mac stifled her laughter. That girl knew how to wrap her father around her finger. Harm sighed. Sometimes he hated himself for being hook, line and sinker with his daughter. As if he could ever really refuse her anything.

"You're right, Tally. A princess is even more special than a burger. But it's work, and you know Daddy can't always bring you to work. I'm not making any promises."

"Okay."

That was all? She wasn't going to put up a fight? Harm looked at Mac, completely thrown off track. "Okay?" he mouthed.

Mac shrugged. "I don't know," she whispered.

Harm narrowed his eyes at Tally. "That's it? Just okay?"

"I'll meet her one day, Daddy," his daughter stated matter-of-factly. "I'm sure of it."

He opened his mouth to give her a response, but found that he didn't have one. So they ate their ice cream, while Harm explained to Mac how the Admiral had saddled him with the Princess.

"You want me to get her from Adele?" Mac asked, gesturing to Tally.

"Would you mind? It'll be only for two days. I hope," he added.

Mac shook her head. "Of course not."

Later, watching Mac and Tally on a swing, playing and laughing, Harm found that the ache of it not being Diane playing with their daughter had somehow lessened a little bit. The pain wasn't as sharp and present as it had been in the beginning.

So, maybe, just maybe, his heart was on its way to healing, just a little bit.


	14. Chapter 14

_So, this took me way, way longer than I thought it would. But life got busy, my computer had a virus and needed a complete reboot, yada yada yada. I'm glad I'm back. _

_I took some liberty with the Washington Holiday story line, so I can tell you up front Megan doesn't die, and there won't be any complicated assassin stuff. Way to difficult to work it in. And you all have to wait till the next chapter to find out if Tally meets her princess. ;-) _

* * *

Rabb apartment  
Georgetown, VA  
2150 hours local

Harm kicked his shoes off and looked at Mac. "I swear, the girl is spoiled and stubborn and a whole bunch of other things that I hope Tally will never be."

Mac had to keep herself from laughing. "Surely dinner at the Senator's house couldn't have been that bad."

"She drank three glasses of champagne, then climbed out of the bathroom window, and I had to go all the way downtown to go Officer and a Gentleman on her, because she wouldn't come of her own free will." He shook his head in disbelief. "At least we get to do something fun tomorrow."

"Since when does a tour of Washington excites you?" Mac asked, gathering her things.

"It doesn't," he confirmed. "But Webb decided to change the itinerary. We're going to Norfolk to look at some of those 'big ships', as he put it."

"Why would he suddenly change the itinerary?"

"Someone tried to kill the Princess in Brussels two days ago, so it's a risk to keep her out in the open in DC. Besides, I have less of a chance she'll run on me when she's on an aircraft carrier."

Mac had to agree with him on that. "So, what is the plan for Saturday? You want to go together to the Willard?"

For a tiny moment Harm looked confused. Then his face lit up. "The NATO ball. Right. Sorry, I keep going back to seeing Tally in fifteen years. God help me."

She closed her bag and patted his head. "I don't think that you'll have to worry about Tally being a spoiled brat in fifteen years. She's way to down to earth for that."

"Is she? Because the Princess' mother died when she was six, and the King just told me that he wishes he had been stricter with her than he has been."

Oh, the way he could doubt himself sometimes. "Harm, you don't have to worry about being not strict enough. You're doing great. Besides, Tally grows up in a completely different environment than the Princess has, and usually that makes a big difference."

"If you say so, Mac."

"I do." She looked around to see if she hadn't forgotten anything, when there was a knock on the door. "Are you expecting someone?"

Harm shook his head no, and when Mac opened the door, he realized that maybe he shouldn't have been so friendly with his new neighbor. "Megan."

Megan looked from Harm to Mac and back, the smile on her face faltering just a little bit. "I'm sorry for interrupting, but I saw you coming out of the elevator." She held up an empty container. "Do you think that I could borrow some coffee? With all this moving stuff, I haven't really had time to go grocery shopping."

"Of course." He was up his feet, and then changed his mind. "Actually, Mac, would you mind? I really want to get out of this uniform."

While it was a lame excuse, it took Mac two seconds to see right through him. He had been his usual friendly self, and while she had seen Megan unpack when she got home with Tally, she hadn't known that Harm had seen her too. But of course he had. And of course the newbie would be all over him.

Megan recognized her too. "You were with that little girl."

Mac took the container from her and went to the kitchen. "I was. I'm Sarah, the little girl is Tally."

"Megan O'Hara. I moved in just down the hall."

"We saw you unpacking. I'm sorry we didn't stop to help, but Tally had been in the car for a while and really, really, needed a bathroom." Mac winked. "Milk? Sugar?"

"No, thank you. All black for me."

"Well, here you go."

Harm came out of the bedroom in sweats and a T-shirt. "You moved everything in? Or anything we can help with?" He almost empathized the _we_.

Megan shook her head, looking around. "No, I'm fine. You've done a great job with the place. It looks nothing like my apartment."

"It's all right," he shrugged. Casually he went to stand half behind Mac, leaning one hip against the countertop.

"He's being modest. He worked really hard to get it right." Mac rolled her eyes at him. "When it's all squared away and clean, you could take pictures for an interior design magazine."

"I should, actually." Megan smiled. "I'm the new lifestyle columnist for the Washington Post," she explained to Mac. "It would be great if I could take some pictures, sometime. I'll make them from my place first, so we have a before and after."

"No problem. Just let us know a few days upfront. A clean place is nicer to photograph."

"Will do." Megan held up her container. "Thanks for the coffee."

Mac closed the door behind her and shook her head at Harm's apologetic and sheepish look, laughing. "Let me guess, you were your usually friendly self?"

He nodded, then shrugged.

"Harm, really…" Mac paused for a while. "I know that being your friendly, wonderful self gets you into situations like this, and I don't mind… It's just that, well, we women can take a hint. And if you're not interested, you can say that out loud too. There _are_ other fish in the sea."

"Is it?" He was clearly doubting her words. "I'm sorry… It's just that I've been out of it for so long, and I don't want to give the wrong impression…"

"Why would saying that you're not interested in dating her, be giving the wrong impression? Hiding behind me is worse, honestly." Mac found herself being irritated by his behavior. "I know that being a gentleman means a lot to you, Harm, but sometimes the more gentleman thing to do is be honest, than to give someone the really wrong impression."

Harm had to give her that. He was being a coward, hiding behind her instead of being honest with Megan. When Di was still alive, she would just step in or he would mention that he was married and that was it. But getting back into the dating scene was difficult, and he didn't know how to react. It had been a while since women would throw themselves at his feet, so to say, and he was actually free to do something with it.

"You're right, I'm sorry. I guess I'll just have to figure out how to deal with it on my own. I was wrong involving you."

Mac heaved a sigh. "Just think before you act, okay?" She took her bag from the table. "I know it's hard, but you have to find a way to handle it. I can't always be here to rescue you."

"I know." He gave her a small smile. "I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Yeah, you will." As always, she gave his hand a squeeze in passing. "Night, Harm."

"Night."

Once in her car, Mac took several deep breaths. Why was she so bothered with him hiding behind her? Even a big, strong guy like Harm needed someone to hide behind. And Mac had known that he had that effect on women and didn't know he had. He honestly didn't know how to handle it.

Then why did it bother her so much? A part of her was flattered that he would use her as his shield, sort of, because it meant her trusted her. _But doesn't he just do that because you're Di's look-a-like? Because it's easy? And convenient?_

Mac didn't want to believe it. He wouldn't do that because it was just easy. _Aren't you just thrown off because you felt like his for just a tiny moment? And because you really liked that feeling? _

Quickly, she buried that thought. And she buried it deep. Because admitting that she was slowly falling for Harmon Rabb Jr. was the last thing Mac was going to do. She'd take it to her grave if she had to. She really would.


	15. Chapter 15

_Wow, I know it's been ages since I update this. Let's just say that I've had a bit of writer's block with this chapter, and it's been writing itself one sentence at a time. It's frustrating. Hopefully, it will be out of the way now. And I apologize upfront for the abrupt ending of the chapter, but I had to leave it somewhere. Let me know what you think! _

* * *

Rabb apartment  
Georgetown, VA  
2010 hours local

After that sort-of tiny situation yesterday, Mac had pulled her wall up, afraid that she was going to show something to him that she didn't want him to see. So she was trying to avoid a personal conversation. Up until now they'd only discussed his day with the Princess, Tally's day in school and her day at JAG.

Maybe it was silly, being like this. But Mac wasn't going to let her emotions get the better of her. She was already getting attached to Tally as it was. No need to complicate things further and fall for the wonderful husband of her sister. Harm was never going to feel the same, anyway.

So she did what she'd always done. She pulled her shield up, trying not to get hurt. Under that tough Marine exterior there was still that little girl that heard her parents fight every night; that would pray things would change for the better. The one that felt abandoned and neglected. Keeping her shield intact was going to be better.

"Harm, have you seen her book?" Mac stepped back into the living room.

It wasn't only Harm standing in the living room. With him was a pretty brunette, who looked caught with her hand in the cookie jar. Harm looked uncomfortable and cleared his throat. But before he could say anything, the young woman opened her mouth.

"I'm very sorry for interrupting. I just wanted to go over our itinerary for tomorrow." She had the grace to look slightly embarrassed. "I haven't even introduced myself. Alexandra of Romania."

So this was the Princess. "It's nice to meet you, Princess. Sarah Mackenzie." She looked awfully young to be flirting with Harm. Then again, stranger things had happened. "I only wanted to know…"

"Mommy?"

And of course Tally chose this moment to interrupt. Mac just wanted to get out of there, but she had promised Tally a bedtime story, and she couldn't just back out now. "Yes, sweetheart?"

Tally shuffled into the room, her teddy bear clutched into her hand, looking shyer than Mac had ever seen her. Seeing a real Princess was going to be a big thing for an almost four-year-old. "Who is that?"

Immediately, Alexandra went down on her haunches. "I'm Alexandra, but my friends call me Alexi."

It did little to settle Tally's suspicion. She hid behind Mac, holding onto a leg. "My daddy had to work with a Princess," she finally blurted out.

Alexandra had to laugh. "Really? Have you met her?"

Tally shook her head. "No. But I want to. I have never met a real Princess before." Some of Tally's spontaneity was returning. Usually, Mac thought it made her adorable and sweet, but tonight she had little tolerance for it.

"Honey, we need to get you of to bed."

But both Tally and Alexi had all the time in the world. Alexi stuck her hand out. "Well, Miss Rabb, you can tell everyone that you have met a real princess now. I am Princess Alexandra of Romania."

That left Tally star struck, if only for a moment. "A real princess?"

"A real princess."

"But where is your crown? Don't all princesses wear crowns?"

Of course there couldn't be a princess without a crown. It was every girls dream. Princesses wear crowns. Alexi had to smile. "Crowns are only for special occasions," she told Tally. "I don't wear a crown every day."

Tally could agree with the special occasions part. "Like hamburgers are for special days."

"Exactly."

Finally, Harm stepped in. "Tally, honey, it really is your bedtime." He took the few steps in between and picked Tally of the floor. "Say good night to Princess Alexandra and go get your book from under your bed. I'll be right there to tuck you in."

If she wasn't happy with it, Tally didn't show it. She just had her wish come true; she had met the Princess, so what more could she want?

When Mac and Tally had disappeared into Tally's bedroom, Alexandra turned back to Harm. "They're beautiful."

Harm had to give her that. "They are."

"I really am sorry for showing up like this. I should've thought about the fact that you have a private life." She looked genuinely embarrassed.

"It's all right, Princess. You really couldn't know."

"I could, actually." Alexandra smiled. When Harm looked confused, she nodded to his hand. "You are wearing your wedding ring."

Being so accustomed to the feel of his ring, Harm really didn't think about it anymore. But he was still wearing his. Maybe part of him was not completely ready to let go of Diane yet; maybe it was just a reminder of the wonderful time they'd had.

Alexandra turned to the door. "I'll see you tomorrow," she said.

"Are you all right getting back to your house?"

"I will be." With one last smile, she walked out of the door.

In Tally's room, the little girl was way to excited to go to sleep. Mac shook her head at her. "Honey, you should really try and get some sleep. Tomorrow is an early day."

"But it was a Princess, Mommy! A real Princess!"

"You're right." Mac tucked her in for the umpteenth time, as Harm appeared in the doorway. Looking up to him, she met his eyes, really met his eyes, for the first time that night. And she couldn't deny that she was falling for him anymore.

He grinned at her and sat down beside Tally on the edge of her bed. "I know you're over the moon, sweetheart, but you really need to go to sleep. Dream of the Princess, tonight, okay?"

With a little more encouragement, Tally finally tried to close her eyes. The two adults went back to the living room, and Mac started to pack her bag. Harm frowned at her. "You're leaving already?"

Mac nodded, again not meeting his eyes. "I've had a busy day, Harm, and tomorrow will be the same. I want to finish some things up, and get to bed early."

Harm understood her reasoning, but something felt off. She'd avoided looking at him all night, and the answers to the questions he asked her were short. But he couldn't put his finger on it.

"All right." It was all he could. "See you tomorrow?"

"Bright and early." One last smile and she was out the door.

Harm narrowed his eyes at his closed door. Something was off with Mac, but he didn't understand what. Maybe he'd been wrong to ask her to babysit Tally this week, while he was of protecting the Princess. He'd call Adele tomorrow; see if she could take Tally for the remaining day.

On her way to the car, Mac could beat herself up. Of course Harm would notice something was wrong when she behaved like that. She needed to get her feelings under control. She had to work with him, for heaven's sake! Doing this was not going to make it easier. At least Tally had a great night.

But she had to figure out how to handle this; and as quickly as possible, too.


	16. Chapter 16

Hey, guys! Again, it's been ages since I've updated. I hope you can forgive me. The story is outlined, I know where I want to take it, but it seems that it will only write itself half a sentence at a time. And that's hard. All my usual tricks to jumpstart writing don't work, for one reason the other, so I'm just going with whatever flow I seem to get. I'm sorry. I wish it was writing faster than this, trust me. Anyway, after the last two chapters being Mac's POV, we're seeing Harm now. Hope you enjoy.

* * *

Rabb Residenc  
Georgetown, VA  
0102 hours local

Harm was staring up at his ceiling, unable to sleep. It had been a few weeks since their night at the Willard. He had danced with Harriet and Mac, mostly Mac, and for some reason he was still thinking about it.

_"I know this is like dancing with your sister," _she had said.

Technically, that was what she was. His sister-in-law. But he didn't think about her like that. Of course she was Tally's aunt; but she was his co-worker as well, and a fellow officer. She was his friend.

Very rarely, he would look right through her Marine uniform, and see Diane. But the last time he had done that; he could barely remember. It had been weeks, probably months already. When he had picked her up to go the Willard, his heart had stopped for a slight moment when she had come into sight. And he had responded as any man would have. He had just seen a desirable woman; a woman to date, to get to know better.

So seeing her as his sister was not even on the list. But the Princess had done a very smart observation while she was here. His wedding ring. His wedding ring had been there since the moment he'd said "I do" to Diane. Most days he didn't think twice about it. But it had been almost three years since her death.

He had to admit that it had been convenient. Nobody would question his marital status, and he wouldn't have to explain. To the outside world, he was still married. And in his heart, he had been, all this time, too. But Mac was right. He was going to have to find a way to deal with attention, especially from single women. And he had to get back into the dating pool at some point.

But he also felt that he couldn't just take his ring off. It presented a very important part of his life, and if he was going to take it off, he wanted, needed to tell her. So, in the very early hours of the day, Harm found himself sitting in front of her gravestone.

"Hi, sweetheart," he said. Talking to her had never been a problem, but somehow, now, he struggled to find words. He cleared his throat. "I've been thinking… It's been almost three years since you left…" The lump in his throat made it difficult to speak, so he swallowed and started again. "You know I love you, right? That I always will? That Tally always will?"

He paused, deciding to be blunt. "I'm going to take my ring off, Di. And that won't mean that I love you any less; it doesn't mean that at all. It just means that I'm going to move on, I guess. And I know that you'd want me to be happy, even if that means that it will be with someone who isn't you. It took me a while to see that, but I do. I see that now." He gulped. "I've loved you for a long time, and both Tally and I have been so lucky to have had you in our lives for as long as we have… But Tally deserves a mother, someone who is going to be there for her, someone she can talk to. And I would like to have someone to come home to, eventually. That doesn't mean that there's someone waiting right now, but I just would like to see how the dating thing works, and I need to figure that out on my own, without hiding behind us and what we used to be."

For a moment he was silent. "Please, don't hate me for doing this. It's time to deal with this situation best I can. And I promise that I won't introduce Tally to anyone, unless it becomes serious. So, that might take a while; you know how long it took me to ask you out." He had to smile at the memory. "I had to work up the courage to utter a single word to you for weeks, and even then, I couldn't really say anything I wanted to say." His first few words to her had been terrible. He couldn't remember what he had said, exactly, but his first few sentences to her had been awful. Luckily for him, Diane had seen right through him and he got a second chance at making a first impression.

"We were great together, Di," he whispered. "And I will always cherish that. And I will tell Tally how wonderful you were, when she's really old enough to understand. Every now and then she'll slip up, and get confused, and still call Mac 'Mom'. I'm sure she's not doing it on purpose. It doesn't bother me as much as it used to, though. Having Mac there is good for her; someone to look up to, to feel safe with, too, I guess. It helps of course, that Mac's family to her."

Harm sighed. "Maybe I'll fall in love with someone who is just as wonderful as you were. Wish me luck, please? Let me know when I'm somehow screwing it up? You know I tend to stick my foot in my mouth, so try and tell me when I've done that?" He pressed his fingers to his lips and then to the cold stone. "I love you, Di, don't you forget that. I always will."

And hour later, back home, for the first time in almost ten years, Harm slipped his ring off his finger and put it in the box where he kept Di's rings. Maybe Tally would like to have them once she was old enough.

Not only did his finger feel bare; for a moment Harm had the strange feeling that a weight had been lifted of his shoulders. Perhaps that was Di's way of telling him that it was okay?


	17. Chapter 17

Hi, everyone! It's been ages since I update this story, and I had this chapter finished, just didn't post it for whatever reason. :O So, this one is for Talia, who reviewed to let me know there are still people out there who are reading this. ;-)

* * *

JAG HQ  
Falls Church, V  
1610 hours local

And of course Mac was the first one to notice that something was different. It took her almost a day, though, and Harm hadn't really thought about it anymore. After taking off his ring, he hadn't looked back. Tally hadn't noticed anything, of course, and both Sunday and Monday had gone on the way they always did.

He was coming back from the break room; a fresh cup of coffee in his hands, when Mac approached him. "Can I run something by you?"

"Always." He led the way to his office, and Harm offered her a chair. "What is it?"

Mac didn't answer him for a long moment, and when he looked up, Harm noticed she was staring at his hands. "Mac? Something wrong?"

"Where's your ring?" The moment those words left her mouth, Mac regretted them. Not exactly the words itself, but the tone she had spoken them in. "I mean…"

Harm smiled. "It's time to move on, Mac. The Princess made a very good observation when she was here, and I finally understood what I have been doing all this time."

She frowned, looking for an explanation. "Which is what, exactly?"

"I've been hiding behind my ring, and what it stands for. All this time it's been really easy, because women will see it and conclude that I'm off the market, and it's been very convenient that way." He shrugged. "But you were right, and Alexi was right. It's time to move on; not that it means that I love Di any less, but just that I can't, and don't want to, spent the rest of my life alone. And eventually Tally is going to need a mother in her life, someone who is going to be there."

Mac nodded; even though her heart was not into it. She was going to have to hide herself behind all the professionalism she could muster, and be his friend and co-worker. Besides, she'd only known them for what? A grand total of eight, maybe nine months? She was not normally one to get attached to someone in such a short period of time.

"… back into the dating pool it is," Harm finished. He could see that Mac was not exactly over the moon by his admission that he was moving on from Diane. Maybe she was worried about Tally. "Mac, I promise you, I won't introduce Tally to anyone until I'm sure it's serious. I'm not going to do that to her."

That finally took Mac out of her head. "I know," she said. "I'm not worried about that. I know Tally is your everything, and you've been a great dad so far, so that's not going to change." She regarded him for a moment. "Are you sure you're ready?"

He'd been wondering the same, ever since Saturday night. "I am. It feels peaceful, and right, and I'm sure that Di would want us to be happy. Even without her there."

Yeah, Mac had to give him that. He had waited long enough. Di had been gone almost three years; he couldn't be alone forever. Not that he would be. As soon as word was out Harm was back into the dating pool, women would be all over him. And Mac couldn't say that she'd blame them. "You're right." She settled back into her chair. "So, any dates lined up yet?"

Harm almost chocked on his coffee. "Seriously, I admit that I'm ready to move on and you expect me to have a full ball book already?"

"You never know," Mac shrugged. "Once word gets out…"

"About me dating?"

"About you dating… Women are going to throw themselves all over you, and you should be prepared."

Harm didn't seem convinced. "Don't you think you're exaggerating? Just a little bit?"

Boy, had he been wrong. Mac had been right. He should've prepared himself. Even going grocery shopping with Tally was a thing these days. Women would come up and start a conversation, and get flirty when there was no visible sign of attachment to someone else. He was ill prepared. Very ill prepared. He'd thrown himself of the deep end without realizing what that was really going to mean. Part of him wanted to run and hide behind Mac, but she had made clear she was not going to tolerate that, and she was right. He was a grown man, he should be able to react and be clear about what he wanted.

A few weeks after his decision he run into Megan. He was just taking Tally and his groceries up to the apartment, when she exited hers. She smiled. "Hey, it's been a while."

"It has," he agreed. "You settled in yet?"

"Yeah, it beginning to look like something." Megan shifted her bag. "Is everything okay with Sarah?"

Harm frowned, opening the door and letting Tally in. "With Sarah?"

Shrugging, Megan looked at him. "I haven't seen her around… And your ring disappeared, so I thought…"

Harm swallowed. "Megan… I owe you an explanation. Or, a clarification, at least." He ran his hand through his hair. "Sarah is Tally's aunt, not her mother. Tally's mother, my wife, died three years ago. I just didn't decide that it was time to take my ring of until a few weeks ago."

Megan nodded. "That does explain a lot… Tally looks exactly like her, though."

"She does. Sarah and Diane were twins, so Tally still tends to confuse the two of them. Long story short, Sarah wasn't in our lives when Tally was born."

"Okay." She seemed to take his explanation at face value. "You were just not ready to move on yet?"

"I was just not ready to move on, yet."

"Are you now?"

It was a fair enough question. One that Harm felt he could answer without feeling guilt over his decision. "I am. Still trying to find my place in what they call a dating pool, but I should be fine."

"Glad to hear it." Having heard enough, she changed tactics. "Does the offer to photograph the apartment still stand, though? I have pictures of mine, and it would be really great if I could do a piece about yours."

"Daddy!" Tally threw her arms around his legs. "I'm hungry."

Harm lifted her up and grinned. "Of course you are." Turning back to Megan, he said: "Yeah, of course. Just let me know so I can sort of clean up and we'll work out a date."

"Great." She winked at him. "I'll see you around then. Bye, Tally."

Tally waved, and Harm went over to the kitchen. Feeling happy and content that he finally had a real conversation about where he was in his life without feeling pressured into revealing what his life had been like before Diane died. Maybe he was going to get the hang of this.


End file.
